Why is Elizabeth Edwards going public with her marital problems?
I am always trying to increase awareness, so it’s important that we look at even the unpleasant truths in our lives. It’s interesting to see the amount of denial in Elizabeth Edwards regarding her husband’s affair with a woman she won’t even name. Unfortunately, she knew that John’s candidacy was doomed because the truth was bound to come out, and yet she kept standing there…as his main cheerleader. Political wives are in a difficult situation when their husbands stray, and like Hillary Clinton or Silda Spitzer, Elizabeth stood by her man. Why do they do that? Read my blog on the Huffington Post.
Let’s take the denial first. I mean, wouldn’t you want to know if your husband had fathered an illegitimate child? Pulling the shades down over your eyes and never ever saying out loud the name of the “other woman” (or not allowing Oprah to say her name) won’t help a bit. I’ll say it: Rielle Hunter–a reportedly broke single mother who is probably not the crazy stalker Elizabeth paints as the root of all evil. Read more
I have read so much today that is negative towards Elizabeth Edwards, that I just have to say something in her defense. I speak as a 57 year old woman whose devoted, religious husband began an affair in our 20th year of marriage with a much younger woman and fathered a child with her.
I think what Elizabeth believes she is doing with this book and interview with Oprah is standing up for herself. Even though she was silent during the campaign, (what a trick for John to wait to tell her until after he had announced; he knew she would feel obligated to carry on) she now obviously feels the need to take a different road. It may seem to others that she is unnecessarily creating more pain for herself and her family, but she would not be doing this if she was not deriving something for herself in these actions, something that for her is empowering. And while it’s true that real power cannot be derived from indulging in spite and anger, no one is in a position to really know her motivations except herself and her God. The book and interview may be acts of cleansing that she needs to go through that will aid her health.
Give the woman a break. Unless you’ve been through the kind of heartache that only betrayal can deliver, you really cannot judge her. On top of this, she is struggling with a terminal illness. Jesus.
And as for her not wanting to speak the name of the other woman…good for her! This is NOT denial, she knows her name, and she knows everyone else knows her name. But why should she dignify this woman on national TV by speaking her name???
My husband and I tried for a while to recover from his choices but we are separated and will probably stay that way. It was incredibly hard to accept the sudden and jarring earthquake in our lives. Facing the end of a long-term marriage is very painful and disorienting. Elizabeth is right to say that one must face a new reality. And each person must come to grips with the new reality in their own way and on their own timetable.
@ May 7th, 2009 at 19:45